By Abigail Ducharme
When you begin choosing yourself, others may resist. But keep going. The ones meant to walk with you will rise to meet the version of you that finally feels whole.
Because loving yourself first isn’t selfish—it’s how you show the world how to love you, too.
And that is true recovery.
Let’s Talk About Stress
Stress and anxiety usually hit hardest when we’re under pressure. For me, that can look like staying up late working on homework or a big project, studying for an exam, preparing for a presentation, or playing in an intense volleyball match. Whether it’s school, sports, or our own expectations—we often carry a lot on our shoulders.
And when we do, it can feel like we’re tearing ourselves apart from the inside out.
But here’s the good news: you’re not alone, and there are ways to manage it.
What’s Helped Me
Some things that have really helped me when I’m overwhelmed:
- Taking a break. Just stepping away for a bit can make all the difference.
- Talking to someone I trust. Whether it’s texting a friend, calling a sibling, or chatting with a parent face-to-face, it helps.
- Listening to music or watching something funny. It’s a simple way to hit the reset button on your brain.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned? When your mind is racing, your decisions usually aren’t the best. Taking a break gives your brain time to breathe. It clears the fog and helps you come back stronger, calmer, and with a better mindset.
And while some people need space, others—like me—sometimes just need to vent. Keeping your feelings bottled up is like shaking a soda bottle: eventually, it’s going to explode. Reaching out to someone you trust helps you release that pressure in a healthy way.
What to Do When You Can’t Step Away
Of course, not every situation gives you the luxury of stepping away. A lot of our anxiety comes from school—things like public speaking, group projects, or timed tests.
In those moments, I’ve learned to focus on small things that ground me:
- Take a few deep breaths.
- Drink some water.
- Remind yourself: You’ve done hard things before—you can do this too.
It’s not always about eliminating stress. It’s about learning to navigate through it.
Advice for Other Teens
If you’re another teen going through this, here’s something I’ve learned:
Your circle matters.
Surround yourself with people who lift you up. That old saying, “garbage in, garbage out,” is real. If your friends are constantly negative, it rubs off. But if they’re supportive, kind, and optimistic—even in tough situations—that energy is contagious too.
Good friends can help you see the light in the dark. They can remind you that you’re not alone, and that whatever you’re going through, you will get through it.
Advice for Parents
And now, for the parents out there—thank you for caring. Seriously. I know it’s not always easy to know how to help, so here’s what’s made a difference for me:
- Be present. Just knowing you’re around and that you care gives us a huge sense of comfort, even if we don’t say it out loud.
- Ask how we’re doing. It seems simple, but it matters. Sometimes teens pull away not because we don’t want to talk—but because we’re afraid. We might think you’ll be upset, won’t understand, or just won’t get it. A simple, “How are you feeling today?” can open the door for a really important conversation.
We may not always show it, but your support means everything.
Final Thoughts
Stress and anxiety aren’t signs of weakness—they’re signs that you care deeply. That you’re working hard. That you’re trying. And while those feelings can be overwhelming, there’s always hope—and there are always people willing to help.
Thanks for listening, and remember: you are not alone.
Abigail Ducharme
She Talks Youth Ambassador
